Inky: Ever think about the question of whether it exists or not? Whether we are partakers or makers of the abstract idea that there is a predestined path for you that leads you to the lessons you must learn, need to learn in order to, well, move on.
I’ve often thought about it, took it out, and examined it, just like today. It’s getting close to Feb 14th, and the TV is filled with commercials for flowers, heart shaped fruit, and of course diamonds. Valentine’s day, the holiday for lovers is rapidly approaching.
Around this time of year, my thoughts revisit the men in my life, the way they came in, and the way they left. The romance, the enormous capacity for love, and the heart break. I will give you the numbers though they mean little without the essence, but it goes like this. Engaged four times. Married once. Truly head over heels, soul shattering in love, twice. I know, it doesn’t add up. But then life doesn’t either no matter how you try to mash up the numbers.
I gave my heart away two times and had it handed back to me shattered, four. There’s a lesson in there somewhere and I’ll be damned if I’ve been able to settle on it.
Maybe it’s that no matter what happens in the future you should love with all you are in the moment. Or maybe, that trust is not meant to be cautious but should be given freely, just as you do your heart. Or better yet that love doesn’t define you, instead offering you an opportunity to be something better regardless of it’s outcome. Or maybe it’s as simple as I met my split apart, and it wasn’t time. We still had lessons to learn.
I rather like the last one because it intimates there will be another time, another place. Shattered heart or no, I will always be ready for that…